In response to http://listenkiddoyoucantfightatidalwave.blogspot.com/2010/09/on-matchmaking.html
In posting the following, I have two aims. The first is to say I am glad she recognizes that attempts at match-making are motivated by hopes for the well-being and romantic bliss of others. I am glad that deep down she appreciates the work we match-makers do and has not mistakenly fallen under the presumption that such efforts are contrived to make miserable her life.
Secondly, I would like to defend my Gift. I am aware that she was not talking about me when she referred to "one dear friend in particular who sincerely believes she is The Authority when it comes to matchmaking...she cites two 'successful' unions..." This must have been another friend she was talking about, as we all know I have been implicated in more than two romantic arrangements.
Let me explain: in the past I have not been completely accurate in my descriptions of my Gift. I have not been intentionally misleading; rather, I am only now coming to a fuller understanding of my Gift. My Gift is not match-making, per se. In fact, it is much bigger than that - I suppose you could call it the ability to recognize Romantic Potential.
Have you read The Giver? It is kind of like Jonas' ability to See Beyond (color), or the Giver's ability to Hear Beyond (music). If you haven't experienced it, you can't really understand it. Anyway, this gift enables me to do a number of things, and match-making is only one of them. I can tell when people like each other, or if they are eventually going to like each other (no guarantee of romantic bliss here). I can tell when people are going to get married. And I can recognize compatibility between my friends (sometimes called match-making).
Let me now cite examples (more than two!)
1. DW and CC. Two fellow counselors. I recognized signs of romantic potential months before they did, amidst vehement objections by both parties. They began dating at the end of the summer.
2. GM and SM. My sister and a former romantic interest. I said they would like each other. They did. There were a lot of tears and mean words and hurt feelings before it was all over, but I predicted it nonetheless.
3. JM and PD. Fellow counselors. I knew both of them individually but had never seen them interact with one another. My understanding of their personalities allowed me to divine that she liked him without ever observing them in communication with each other.
4. JF and MP. Predicted in 2003 that they would marry. Married in 2008.
5. KS and IC. I was friends with KS, never had met IC. She mentioned IC for the first time, and in a completely non-romantic context. Through some sort of inspiration, most likely of the divine variety, I foresaw that they would be married. They were.
6. ER and RG (or Match-Making Attempt #1). In a succession of awkward conversations and arrangements, I introduced two friends over a thirty-minute game of cards in a group setting. Although they got along well and had plenty to talk about, as well as plenty in common, and they both appreciated the other's sense of humor, they refused to ever speak to each other again.
7. DW and MB. Again, I recognized compatibility between two of my friends who did not know each other. While there was interest on both sides upon hearing details about the other party she refused to meet him.
8. CB and and RS. In progress. Circumstances have not yet worked out such that they have been able to meet each other.
Like I said, I have a Gift. Apparently I'm not very good at the process of match-making, or at least not at the steps to take after a match has been made - I know how to see when people are perfect for each other, but I don't know how to convince them to give each other a chance. I don't have the sweet talking skills or the cunning to arrange a chance meeting or a blind date. I don't have the temperment to talk stubborn people into taking a risk for true love. It's something I need to work on. But a little cooperation wouldn't hurt.
To summarize, I have demonstrated the Gift of Recognizing Romantic Potential and Compatibility. So if the people I have tried to match would please give the matches I have made a chance, things might start to work out and they would find happiness. Or if they want they can scoff at my talent and continue to wander around aimless and lonely. Or they can pay money to an online dating site when I render my services for free out of the kindness of my heart. Either way, it's their loss.
